Causes of Disunity in the Family

Causes of Disunity in the Family

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Causes of Disunity in the Family

Family is the cornerstone of our lives, a sanctuary where love and support should be abundant. However, in today’s world, many families face disunity. In this article, we will explore the causes of disunity in the family, shedding light on these issues and offering insights to promote unity, harmony, and a stronger family bond.


Family, they say, is where life begins and love never ends. It’s a place where we should feel safe, valued, and loved unconditionally. However, the reality often falls short of this ideal. Families can sometimes face disunity, and understanding the underlying causes is essential for resolving these issues.

**1. Lack of Effective Communication**

One of the most significant contributors to disunity in the family is a lack of effective communication. Misunderstandings and conflicts can easily arise when family members don’t communicate openly and honestly. When individuals don’t feel heard or understood, it can lead to resentment and emotional distance.

**2. Financial Stress**

Financial issues are another common source of family disunity. Struggles with money, budgeting, or disagreements on spending priorities can strain relationships. Financial stress can lead to arguments and impact the overall atmosphere at home.

**3. Unresolved Conflicts**

Conflict is a natural part of any relationship, but when conflicts go unresolved, they can fester and lead to disunity. Family members may harbor grudges, and these can create an emotional divide within the family.

**4. Unrealistic Expectations**

Expecting too much from family members or having unrealistic expectations about how family life should be can result in disappointment and disunity. It’s essential to have realistic expectations and acknowledge that every family has its imperfections.

**5. Lack of Quality Time**

In our busy lives, it’s easy to become preoccupied with work, school, or other commitments. This can result in a lack of quality time spent together as a family. Neglecting quality time can weaken the family bond.

**6. Cultural and Generational Differences**

Cultural and generational differences can sometimes lead to disunity within a family. Different belief systems, values, or ways of doing things can create tension. It’s crucial to respect these differences and find common ground.

**7. Substance Abuse and Addiction**

When a family member struggles with substance abuse or addiction, it can have a devastating impact on the family unit. This issue can lead to emotional turmoil and disintegration of the family structure.

**8. Inadequate Conflict Resolution Skills**

Family members may not possess the necessary skills to resolve conflicts in a healthy and constructive manner. This can lead to escalating arguments and further disunity.

**9. Infidelity and Broken Trust**

Infidelity and breaches of trust can have severe consequences for the family. These issues can lead to broken relationships and emotional trauma, causing disunity within the family.

**10. External Pressures**

Sometimes, external pressures like work-related stress, societal expectations, or peer influences can affect the family dynamic and create disunity.

**11. Parenting Styles**

Differing parenting styles among family members can also be a source of disunity. For instance, if one parent is more permissive while the other is stricter, it can create tension and discord. Consistency in parenting styles and open discussions about these matters can help mitigate this issue.

**12. Sibling Rivalry**

Sibling rivalry is a common occurrence in many families. Competition among siblings for attention, love, or resources can lead to disunity. Parents play a critical role in managing and mediating sibling conflicts, fostering a sense of fairness and unity among their children.

**13. Mental Health Issues**

Mental health challenges within the family can have a profound impact on its unity. Conditions such as depression, anxiety, or other mental health issues can lead to misunderstandings, isolation, and emotional strain. It’s crucial to support family members facing these challenges and seek professional help when needed.

**14. Lack of Boundaries**

Clear boundaries are essential in maintaining healthy family dynamics. When boundaries are unclear or non-existent, it can result in issues such as invasion of personal space or interference in each other’s lives, which can lead to disunity.

**15. Lack of Forgiveness**

Holding onto grudges and refusing to forgive past transgressions can be a significant cause of disunity. Forgiveness is a crucial element in healing and rebuilding relationships within the family.

**16. External Influences**

Outside influences, such as friends, extended family members, or cultural norms, can sometimes impact family unity. Conflicting advice or interference from external sources can create tension within the family. It’s essential for families to communicate openly and set boundaries when dealing with such influences.

**17. Loss and Grief**

The loss of a family member through death or separation can have a profound impact on the family’s unity. Grief and mourning can affect family dynamics and lead to a sense of disconnection. It’s crucial to provide support and understanding during these difficult times.

**18. Lack of Empathy**

Empathy, or the ability to understand and share the feelings of others, is essential for maintaining family unity. When family members lack empathy, they may not be able to relate to each other’s struggles and emotions, leading to disunity.

**19. Neglecting Self-Care**

Neglecting self-care can affect a family’s overall well-being. When family members are stressed, exhausted, or emotionally drained due to neglecting their own needs, it can lead to conflicts and disunity. Encouraging self-care and supporting each other in this regard is crucial.

**20. Power Struggles**

Power struggles within the family, whether related to decision-making, control, or authority, can lead to disunity. It’s important to establish a balance of power and ensure that all family members feel heard and valued.


In conclusion, disunity in the family can arise from a multitude of factors, including differing parenting styles, sibling rivalry, mental health issues, lack of boundaries, lack of forgiveness, external influences, loss and grief, lack of empathy, neglecting self-care, and power struggles. Understanding these causes and working proactively to address them is essential for building and maintaining a strong, united family.
Disunity in the family can result from a combination of factors, including poor communication, financial stress, unresolved conflicts, unrealistic expectations, a lack of quality time, cultural differences, substance abuse, inadequate conflict resolution skills, infidelity, and external pressures. Recognizing these causes is the first step towards finding solutions and fostering a more harmonious family environment. By addressing these issues with understanding, empathy, and patience, families can work towards unity, stronger bonds, and a happier, more fulfilling family life.

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Joy Chinonyerem

Joy Chinonyerem is an ardent follower of Christ who believes in Living the Christian Life according to the tenets set by Christ himself. She is passionate about Walking by Faith, as commanded by the scriptures and uses her blog, Walking By Faith Blog, to minister the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

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